Oh my poor Bella. She has not been very social for a couple of days. We have skipped the park and she doesn't even want her Dunkin Donuts Munchkins... Because of her mood, I'm not getting my much needed exercise which is making me not very social either. She's been lying in her pen ignoring the home populous for two days now. I was starting to think my pup may be depressed. For the life of me I couldn't figure out why until this morning. OMG!! My baby is in HEAT!!!
According to experts; there are three stages of this doggy menstrual cycle. She is in the "spotting" stage called Proestrus. I knew it would happen but as a mom you don't want to have that talk or deal with the thought of your kid having kids. My Bella is not ready for puppies and neither am I. Even though the thought of 10 or 12 little Bella's running around is sweet, I'd lose my freakin' mind!! So would she. I have limited her access to the entire house; a beige couch is not conducive to this particular situation. She is comfortable but not liking only 2 rooms to hang out in. It's really making her incorrigible. She's been whining at me and speaking her mind since we woke up this morning. Enough already!!! Bella sounds like Chewbacca when she gets upset. I feel bad, but it's so funny to hear. My son thought I was watching one of the Star Wars movies today. I said "No, it's just Bella complaining again". I told my husband and he suggested I give her my Pamprin. Hmmm... men think they're funny when it is just not so.
My poor spoiled Bella...She is very upset and if she was able to, I think she'd call my husband and plead her case. I know she wants to file a complaint against me with PetCo. The girls there love Bella and I'm thinking they may be on her side suggesting a blanket over the couch or something. However, I'm not having it!! I looked into Doggie Diapers but then I read somewhere that for a dog of her size, Depends are a better route to take. I'm sorry but I cannot picture my Bella in a diaper. It seems like she'd be very against this idea too. She is a very dignified young lady and I cannot see myself trying to put a damn diaper on her. I believe I may get away without actual puncture wounds, but I think there may be some serious lacerations on my person by the time we were done. I'd also be afraid my son would be trying to videotape the whole incident and put us on YouTube. He thinks my pain is comedic material. TEENAGERS!!!
Oh well, according to these experts the next stage is the one I really need to worry about; Estrus. This is when she is going to be trying to sneak out and see all the boys in the neighborhood. I'm not sure if it is a coincidence or not, but there was a brown and white Pitbull at the end of my driveway today. He appeared to be looking all innocent out for a stroll but I'm thinking he may have been looking for my girl. "Sorry man. She's not your type. Go home." That's what I wanted to tell him but he had some seriously big teeth and I decided I would just let him go on his way. I know male dogs can be quite persistent when trying to hook up on these occasions so I'm keeping Bella under lock and key.
I''m hoping this Proestrus only lasts a few days. The estimated time for the "spotting" stage is 4 to 7 days. After that she is super flirty and will need a chastity belt against all her potential suitors. The last stage is Anestrus which is what I'm looking forward to. That is when the spotting is done, her amourous thoughts will be gone and she'll simply have good ole PMS like the rest of us females!! Then her attitude will be "Leave me the hell alone". For Bella this terrible cycle won't return for another 6 to 7 months. Blessed Be!!!!
Unfortunately for males of our species, this cycle hits us once a month!! "Everyone, please say a prayer for my Bella." She will get through this turmoil and become a woman soon. Maybe in a year or two we will let her actually date one of her admirers which could lead to a loving relationship. At that point we can enjoy 10 or 12 little Bella's running around. But for now, I have to wear earplugs to bed because Chewbacca is in the house!!!!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment